John and Mary
INTRODUCTION
For
many people the gospel of John is a special part of the Bible. It is distinct from the other Gospels in a
number of ways. One of these is its
inclusion of seven sayings attributed to Jesus in which he uses the words ‘I
am….. ‘ This introduction to attributes
which he goes on to claim for himself is powerfully reminiscent of the
description that God gives to Moses when asked for a name as is recorded in
Exodus Chapter 3. v14.
Nothing
like those sayings appears in the other Gospels. The question is: how did John know about
these claims? For me Mary who stored up
so much in her heart is the key. What I
offer here is a possible explanation of how it came about.
IN
THE BEGINNING
It
was a heavy day that clung on to folk like a sullen child, the sort of day that
makes every step laboured and costly. It
was also a day full of expectancy where people looked at the skies wondering
when the storm would come to relieve the tension they felt.
These
were among the woman’s thoughts as she sat at the fireside staring at the empty
grate and shivering despite the heat.
She had travelled up to Jerusalem a few days before and was staying in
this house as the guest of her son’s closest friend John.
She
mused on the day thirty three years before when she had given birth to
Jesus. Never would she then have thought
that his life would end in a few hours time like this, a Jew crucified by
Romans at the behest of his own people.
Mary (that was her name) traced the smoke marks on the chimney breast as
she gazed at it lost in thought.
She
remembered that remarkable day when, having finished her household chores she
was praying in her favourite corner of the living room in her parents’
house. Her Father was out working in the
fields and her mother had gone to the market.
Mary recalled that the sun streamed through the narrow window high up on
the side wall of the house which was meant for ventilation rather than
light. In fact sunlight came through
there only during the summer months and then only for an hour or so in the
middle of the day.
Her
mother claimed at first that her daughter must have fallen asleep and had a
dream but Mary knew that wasn’t the case.
She remembered how the light streaming through the little window had
suddenly become overwhelming, filling the whole room. She remembered being amazed but not
frightened.
It
seemed to Mary that from the midst of the light a figure was emerging who gazed
at her and seemed to be able to place thoughts in her mind. It was from the message imparted to her in
that way that Mary gathered she was to become a mother. Knowing enough about the facts of life as she
did, she was puzzled. Her relationship
with Joseph, to whom she was betrothed, had not reached anywhere near a stage
where motherhood was even remotely possible she thought.
Straight-away
it was as if her mind was read and a message conveyed in reply ‘The Holy Spirit
of God will be Father to the child and so he will be a very special one.’
The
whole of Mary’s upbringing and consequently her knowledge of Scripture, flooded
her mind and left her with but one thought, “If that is God’s will, then so be
it.”
It
seemed to Mary that she had given her consent in this way for the whole room
was suddenly filled with a light so intense, so deep, so rich in golden and
blazing white purity that it would blind or burn her, yet it did neither. She wanted to reach out and touch it yet she
could not and knew that even if she tried, she would take hold of nothing. There was no sound yet she could hear music
but not like anything she had ever heard before. There were no words yet she heard a message
of reassurance and comfort. She was
surrounded, enfolded and at peace.
Just
as suddenly as she had been immersed in this light so it began to fade, gently
disappearing into the walls and through the window leaving Mary in the familiar
room at her prayers and hearing her mother Anne’s voice calling her name,
“Mary?” with just the hint of an anxious question to its tone.
As
she always did, Mary stored in her heart the events of that day. It was months later when the fact of her
pregnancy was evident and beyond denial that she told Anne what had
happened. She also told Joseph who was
initially, and understandably she thought, more sceptical than her mother.
Mary
pondered the scorn that some of her acquaintances had heaped upon her. She also marvelled, as she had done many
times before, at how helpful and understanding her cousin Elizabeth had been. Joseph had married her and smiling to herself
Mary recalled the happiness of that day and then she shivered as she reminded
herself about this one.
At
that moment John’s return with Mary Magdalene brought Mary fully into the
present. He told her that crowds had been gathering at Golgotha since
dawn. A triple crucifixion was not
common and nobody it seemed wanted to miss out on the spectacle.
Usually
a crucifixion could be relied upon to provide entertainment, as some people saw
it, for a couple of days. However, with
a major festival coming up, the Romans would take steps to see that the victims
didn’t linger, so people were making sure they had good vantage points. Mary Magdalene said some of their group had
gone ahead, so with heavy hearts the three set off joining a steady stream of
people moving out of the city towards the hillside.
Month’s
later when reflecting on it all, Mary’s recollection pondered on only two
things. One was the grey-headed
centurion gazing up at Jesus and saying in amazement, “Surely this man is the
Son of God.” Revelation Mary mused comes
at extraordinary times.
Just
as important was her son fixing her with his steady gaze and with his last few
shreds of strength telling her to look on John as her son just as he should
look on her as his mother. A few moments
later and he had died. “So it is,” Mary
reflected. “He gazed on me as he came
into the world and he did so again as he left it. And it takes a Roman to see what many Jews
cannot.”
DO
THIS
“And
so this fireside is now my home and John is my son and my protector. Why is that so important I wonder?” Mary
mused. In the week and months that
followed that momentous day many amazing things had happened which she
continued to ponder and store up in her heart.
Then suddenly it became clear to her what the point of her being with John
was. It came about because of the
question he asked which was in itself a simple one. What he wondered, had gone on between Mary
and Jesus when they had all gone to that wedding at Cana? John, it seemed, had been too far away to
hear.
“Ah,”
said Mary, and she explained how she had had what she described as one of her
‘moments.’ Those were times which didn’t
happen very often but meant that something important was to be done. On this particular day the wine had nearly
run out and their friends were in danger of being very seriously
embarrassed. So she had asked Jesus to
do something about it.
It
seemed like an odd request to make. After all, what could a carpenter, however
good a preacher he might be, do about a shortage of wine? “But,” Mary said, “I knew he could put things
right and not only that but I knew he should, because now was the right time
and the right place. It wasn’t my
decision. I spoke for Another because I
was then the only one who could.
It
was the same feeling and the same voice I had heard thirty years before in
Nazareth before he was born which I heard now.
And so I told the servants to do whatever Jesus instructed. He was not pleased with me. He addressed me as ‘woman’ just like any
other Jewish male would. But then he saw
the look that the voice produced in me and then he knew too that this was the
time. Now there was no going back
Of
course I didn’t know how it would all work out.
How it would end on the cross in order to begin again for eternity. I couldn’t know all that, not then anyway. So we just looked at each other and he
knew.
He
told the servants to fill the jars inside the front door with water, six there
were on either side, and then he said they were to fill wine flagons from
them.
Between
the filling and the drawing he just stared at the jars and then looked up with
his eyes closed. His lips were moving
but I couldn’t hear what he said. You
know the rest. The wine was superb and
the feast became known as the best ever for many years.
And
that, John, is why I am here, I think, so that I can tell you all the things
only a mother can know after living with her only son for nearly thirty years.”
BECOMING
BREAD
So
it was that John received from Mary insights into the way in which Jesus had
talked to her during their many conversations often at what might be called
their lunchtime break.
“At
such times, when there were only two of us, he always called me ‘Mother’ and
over the years I came to know when something serious was on his mind from his
look and tone of voice. I would take his bread, some meat and a piece
or two of fruit into the workshop and there he would be perhaps with a piece of
wood in one hand and a chisel in the other pouring over a scroll.”
“Mother”
he would say. “What would we do without
bread?”
But
on this particular day he said it differently, more slowly and it was
definitely a serious question.
“Why
do you ask?” I replied.
“Because
I know that each day you provide more than enough to keep me well fed and happy
but who feeds my soul?”
He
put down the wood and the chisel, picked up the scroll and read me a
passage. “Man does not live by bread
alone but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of the Lord.” (Deut 8 v3)
“Mother
I work to provide us with money to enable you to buy the food that sustains our
bodies – but our souls- they need something else – they need bread from above –
from the Lord. They need this scroll –
the Word of the Lord.”
“And
he gazed at me so intently and his words became almost a whisper.”
“I
must become that Word for them. I must
live it out, be what is written. Oh I
know they can hear it read in the Synagogue, even read it for themselves, but
they need to see what those words can achieve when they are lived out. I need to become bread for their souls by the
way I live. The words need to have their
home in me.”
“What
did you say?” asked John.
“I
told him that his work was making more than enough for us to live on and that
if he needed more time to study I was sure we would manage. And he just smiled. I also said that the Lord’s word and work
carried out under his guidance would never let us down or leave us wanting.”
“And
then?” John asked.
“And
then” said Mary “he kissed my forehead and said he must finish the yoke he was
working on because it was needed by the end of the day. And so I left to go and think over what he
had said.”
“Was
there anything special you wanted to mull over?” John wondered.
“Only
that he had said, ‘I must become’ – in other words he didn’t think he was there
yet. I also remember thinking that this
was something he had been pondering for quite a while but now he knew how to
make sense of it.”
“What
about since then,” asked John. “Was
there anything else?”
Mary
thought for a long while and eventually she said, “Well, after that our Shabbat
was somehow different.”
John
waited and Mary went on. “We used to
have my sisters and their children come to our Shabbat meal because they were
both widows and Jesus as an only child regarded their children as his brothers
and sisters. They in turn treated him
like an older brother.
Naturally
as the oldest male he presided at the Shabbat but whereas before that
conversation he had performed his role as a duty properly carried out, now it
was much more than that. It had become
almost alive with meaning. They all
noticed it although nobody said anything.
My
sisters told me later that they all found it very moving. I thought to myself that he was living it
out”
WAY,
TRUTH AND LIFE
“One
night,” Mary said, “I woke up with a start knowing that something was not quite
right. I put my cloak on and went into
our main room. I could see that Jesus
was not in his room and that the street door was open. Outside the ladder was up against the wall
and when I went up a few steps I could see Jesus was there on the roof sitting
cross-legged and gazing up at the sky.”
“I
asked him very quietly what on earth he was doing. He whispered to me that he had been reading
the Psalms and especially the one that says ‘Oh Lord my God how majestic is
your name in all the earth.……. when I look at your heavens, the works of your
fingers, the moon and the stars which you have established what is man that you
are mindful of him, and the Son of man that you care for him?’ ” (Ps 8)
“I
went and sat down beside him there on the roof.
It was cold but the sky was magnificent.
The moon gave us just enough light to be safe but not so much as to
obscure the stars which were spread like a canopy of shining jewels. Anyone seeing us would have thought we were
absolutely mad”
“It
is possible, John, to feel so close to the majesty of God under such a sky, and
that night Jesus and I clearly did. Then
it was almost as if he reached some sort of decision because he asked me if I
had ever wondered about life as a kind of journey.”
“
‘Mother,’ he said, ‘it is the way of it, as though I am set on a path which I
can sense but cannot yet quite see. It
is a small path and a narrow one but it runs true. I mean it is always right with itself because
there is only one way which is true and that is also true of our Father’s love
for us.’ ”
“I
was startled John because it was the first time he had ever used that word
‘Father’ in that way and then after a pause he went on. ‘I am beginning to see that my life has to be
lived out following the way I see before me and it must be a way of love.’ ”
“I
don’t know how long we sat there John but dawn was beginning to break when we
came down. Before we did so I took his
hand and told him I believed I knew the way of which he spoke.”
“Did
he say anything more?” asked John. “
Mary
gazed at her hands and then very slowly she said, “He said, ‘I know it Mother,
I know it.’ “Just I know it Mother, I know it.”
THE
GATE
“It’s
strange but true that carpenters can have one thing more than all the rest that
they are really good at. They can’t tell
you why but that’s how it is. With
Joseph it was bowls. Everybody knew it
was a ‘Joseph bowl’ because they really were well made, perfectly shaped and
smooth. With Jesus it was gates. Whether big or small, his gates were
excellent and much sought-after for houses and for barns.”
“One
day when I took him his lunch he was gazing at a fairly large gate on which he
had hung a scroll. Although I had gone
very quietly he must have sensed me there because he said, ‘That’s what the
Father’s word is. It is the gate to our
hearts. It stands guard over us keeping
us safe from the evil thoughts, ideas and influences which constantly seek to
invade. The word of God is like the door of the sheepfold which stops the wolf
from entering.’ Then he took the scroll
down and wound it up, turned to look at me and said, ‘Mother I must become like
this scroll. I must live it and be it so
that I become like a gate passed which the wolf cannot get to those who will
hear and believe in the word they hear from me.’ “
“And
what did you say to that?” John
asked.
“I
think it was something like, Yes Jesus, but not until you’ve had your lunch,
and I remember he roared with laughter and kissed my forehead.”
“It
was not long after that he went off on a long walk. He was gone for a while, I remember it was at
least two nights and when he came back he was very thoughtful.”
“The
next day when I went in with his lunch he was just gazing out of the shop
window. When he heard me he said,
‘Mother, it’s a very hard life out there as a shepherd. It’s not just about protecting them at night,
it’s also about being prepared to go and rescue them when they get stuck or
stranded. Did you know that a shepherd’s
voice will be so well known to his flock that he can call his sheep and they
will go to him and no one else? And when
they came to him, he will know if they are all there. They are devoted people and very tough as
well. They regard the loss of even one
sheep from the flock as failure and are prepared to risk everything to avoid
that happening.’ ”
“I
had sat down to listen to him and after a while I asked who he had stayed
with. ‘I went with Elkinah and his
brother and I couldn’t have made a better choice. They have taught me a lot.’ He grinned when he added, ‘I can see now why
they think we townsfolk are soft,’ and then far more seriously, ‘A good
shepherd will be prepared to lay down his life for the sheep.’ “
“Do
you know John that although that was a very hot day I shivered when he said
that and I remembered something.”
“Go
on” John said.
“I
remembered what Simeon said when Joseph and I took Jesus to the Temple to
present him on the eighth day. He told
me that one day a sword would pierce my soul.
I remember that and now I know why.”
John
waited and eventually Mary continued, “That’s how he came to see himself. He was the good shepherd and we were the
flock.”
The
fire crackled in the grate casting long flickering shadows into the room and
John marvelled at the quiet grace of his silver-haired companion whose memories
he so treasured.
THE
VINE
One
evening having lit the oil lamps and re-stoked the fire John and Mary settled
down after their meal. It was then that
John, having just returned from visiting friends, produced a flagon of wine and
poured a cup for each of them.
“Do
you recognise it?” John asked and Mary exclaimed in surprise.
“Yes,
I do! This is from Capernaum!”
“Indeed!”
said John. “Indeed it is. I got it especially from the vineyards above
the town which used to belong to James but now have passed to his grandson
Mark.”
“My”
said Mary, “that takes me back to a day when Jesus came in, having visited a
customer called James to take some specially prepared supports for his vines,
and gave me a bunch of grapes sent to me as a gift from James. He said ‘Mother, I do believe you have an
admirer.’ I told him not to be so silly
or so cheeky, but secretly I was quite touched because James was a good and
kind man. The grapes were wonderfully
tasty and we shared them with our supper.
It was then that Jesus came out with one of his questions.”
“
‘What do you think,’ he asked, ‘it feels like to be a grafted vine?’ ”
“Almost
without thinking I said that I though it would be very odd at first but then
better and better, Jesus looked at me as
if he were puzzled but then said something about supposing it would but he
hadn’t been thinking that way. I asked
him to explain.”
“I’m
glad you did,” said John “what a very strange question.”
“The
way Jesus saw it,” Mary continued, “was that the vine grower has many potential
grafts to choose from. However, having
chosen and grafted he will still be quite ruthless with those grafted branches
which are not fruitful.”
“Even
more than that however, Jesus was interested in roots. He saw the grafting process as requiring a
fresh start which placed faith on the root system that a grafted branch would
come to rely on having lost its own. He
described the whole thing to me from the choice of the branches to the graft
itself and then the pruning and fruit collection. Clearly he had studied it all very
carefully.”
“
‘Mother’, he said to me, ‘You know that there are many who choose not to be
part of the community who worship our God while others say they do but their
actions and attitudes tell a different story.
I believe that our Father sees it just like the vine-dressers. In our spiritual life there is a vine and all
those who profess belief are grafted into that vine. The vine-dresser then watches and sees that
some grafts never really take because they do not bear fruit. They are pruned away and join those who were
not selected in the first place.’ ”
“ ‘I
am becoming like that vine. I will teach
God’s word and set his example in my life.
Those who have belief in my teaching will be like branches grafted
in. They can then bear fruit and it is
fruit that they can carry with them into our Father’s Kingdom.’ ”
“It
is a wonderful picture don’t you think John?
It is one straight out of the vineyards of Capernaum.”
THE
LIGHT
Mary
had been sitting quietly for some time when she said, “More and more often
before that wedding at Cana Jesus was away from home for longer periods
teaching and travelling. His message was
very straightforward. Although they had
not met since they were boys, he and his cousin John taught things which
complemented each other like, as Jesus once put it, ‘a good tight dove-tail
joint.’ ”
Mary
had paused in her story that evening and John could sense that her
recollections were coming to some sort of conclusion. He also felt that she was tiring, as though
the efforts and experiences of her life were now at long last taking their
toll.
“One
afternoon when he came home, he sat gazing at all his tools and equipment as if
he were seeing them for the very last time.
Then after we had eaten and evening was drawing in he lit an extra oil
lamp and put it on the table we had been using.
‘Mother,’ he said, ‘what do you see?’ ”
“Over
the years, John, I had come to know that the apparently strange questions Jesus
sometimes asked were never ever simple or straightforward. Somehow he managed to see beyond the obvious
into another world of meaning; so I took my time.”
“I
looked at the light of that lamp, then into it and beyond it. I don’t know how long I sat there considering
that light. I do know that night had
come and that the silence was profound.
It was only broken when Jesus spoke again.”
“
‘The darkness cannot put out the light no matter how deep or all-surrounding a
darkness it may be. There will be dark
days Mother, days which will seem to destroy everything by their blackness and
the deeds done in them but the light cannot be put out. Remember this, God himself created light in
the darkness at the Beginning and it has survived, just as his words have
survived in the Law and the Prophets. I
have to become the Light to show the way in through the dark places. There is a world beyond light Mother, and you
and I have glimpsed it together.’ ”
“And
then it was as if that lamp blazed and its light filled the room just as it had
all those years before in my parent’s home.
It was a week later that we went to the wedding at Cana.”
THE
RESSURECTION
“Did
you see Jesus after he was risen?” John
asked the question very quietly and Mary smiled almost as if treasuring the
memory so much that she was reluctant to give it up.
“Just
once,” she replied. “Just the once. Just before you all saw him taken up it
was. He said he had come to tell me that
he was going to leave.
“
‘Mother,’ he said. ‘You know that the cross was not the end and now you see
that resurrection is a reality and that life continues and will continue where
I am going. You also know that you will
see me again in the Kingdom to which I will go and that I will be there to
greet you when it is your time to come and join me. I have become the Resurrection for those who
believe. I have become Life for them. Death must be faced but it no longer has any
power to hold those who believe and live out their faith.’ ”
“And
then he took my hands in his and kissed my forehead and was gone.”
Mary
suddenly appeared to John to have become the old lady she was in reality and he
realised that through all her story telling she had appeared to him to be much
younger than she was. It was almost as
if, he thought to himself, the words, the stories she had told had had the
power to produce vitality in the teller.
“Yes
John,” Mary said,” The words are very, very powerful just like the One whose story
they tell.”
EPILOGUE
Mary
the mother of Jesus is a wonderful example of motherhood, of steadfastness in
adversity and of obedience before God.
She also shows us how to deal with the unexpected by seeing what it has
to teach us. That little phrase which
tells us that Mary stored things up in her heart is very salutary. Especially that is so in an age which looks
for instant reactions and decisions.
Whether
the idea of Mary contributing her recollections to aid John in his Gospel
writing appeals to us or not nevertheless the time the two spent in
conversation must had been very compelling.
Hopefully my comments on it will aid your own meditation.
A J E Kidd Copyright 2016
